TEAM ZOELLA FEBRUARY 22, 2020

How To Be A Better Friend

Much like romantic relationships, friendships require effort and commitment in order for them to thrive.

Like the love fern in How To Lose A Guy In Ten Days, they need regular TLC. You can’t just leave them to fend for themselves. We have to continuously nourish them, honour their importance and give them the energy they deserve.

Work gets in the way, life happens.

We’re all guilty of letting the weeks pass us by without seeing our friends or scheduling in some quality time. Work gets in the way, life happens and before you know it, it’s been six months without the whiff of a glass of vino and a much-needed chinwag.

There’s bound to be periods in your life when you don’t have the time to fart let alone hang out with the girls but looking after those connections and having fulfilling conversations makes us feel seen, understood and appreciated.

And on that note, we’re dedicating this post to bettering our friendship skills. Here’s to being a bloody good pal and getting that well overdue catch up in the diary ASAP.

Don’t flake on plans

Double booked? That’s cool on the first occasion but cancel a fifth time and you’ll forever be known as that flaky friend.

Make plans, be reliable and show up

Make plans, be reliable and show up for others – physically and mentally.

Check-in on them

You don’t have to be geographically close to be emotionally present – a random text asking if they’re having a good week will let them know that regardless of how stacked you are in your own life, they’re still a priority.

Be a great listener

Listening is a h-a-r-d skill to master. If you can actively hear someone out without needing to chime in with your own stories, that’s when you’re really lending an ear. Basically, be a sounding board and know when to shut up every now and again.

Have fun and make new memories

Come through with them Oprah quotes whenever they’re needed but make space for the good times in your friendship too. Laughter lines are a sign of true friendship.

Champion their milestones

Celebrate their wins with them and make a fuss when life is going their way!

Even the smallest gesture can send a clear message that their happiness and success is important to you.

Whether it’s a promotion, a new baby or finally having the confidence to kick that f*ck boy to the curb, even the smallest gesture can send a clear message that their happiness and success is important to you. When they’re winning, you’re winning.

Practise the art of empathy

We all move through life stages at a different pace and while you might not always be on the same page or able to relate to their circumstances, you can certainly try to walk in their shoes for a minute.

Whether they’re single and you’re married or they’re trying to find their feet with motherhood while you’re nowhere near ready for babies, you can still find ways to understand their reality.

Accept that life just gets in the way sometimes

It’s not you and it’s not them – life runs away with all of us sometimes but as long as you’re both aware that it’s a just a phase and that you can pick things back up when things are a little less crazy, that’s all you need to know.

Know when you’re in the wrong

Having the humility to swallow your pride and admit you messed up makes you a top friend. You live and you learn!

Be loyal and trustworthy

With any interpersonal relationship, trust is a real deal-breaker. They need to know that they can confide in you with total confidence. You have their back and then some.

Speak from the heart

Honesty is one of the most significant friendship traits.

Everyone needs a straight-talking chum on speed dial.

Respect their boundaries but never be afraid to offer up some moral guidance if ever they lose perspective.

Accept them for who they are

A good friend is someone who encourages you to be your true authentic self without fear of judgement. They’ll love you despite your shortcomings, weaknesses and wrong moves.

What qualities do you look for in a friend?

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