Just as Taylor Swift predicted, August slipped away into a moment in time in a blur of below-par weather and Casa Amor drama. As soon as that Love Island couple split that 50k we know it’s only a matter of time before we’re eyeing up the pumpkins and lining up the Bake Off snacks. Care to join us as we welcome September and surrender ourselves to all the Homesense candles? In a bit, summer! Average girl Autumn is en route.
1 Ditch your devices for a Digital Detox Day. Sayonara screen time! 📵
2 Find yourself buying clogs. How oh how did we arrive here? 🤦
3 Utter the C-word around your sun-loving Cancerians just to see how they react. Too soon to buy a cinnamon candle and whip out the beret? We think not. Christmas is waiting in the wings 🎅
4 Find yourself watching Elf for “self-care” 🎄 🎄 🎄
5 Tune into Sex Education. Otis, Eric, Maeve, Aimee and the rest of the Moordale Secondary School gang are finally back in our lives for a third season 🍆
6 Embrace that back-to-school energy. Entry-level NVQ let’s go 👀
7 Start scouting out those pumpkin fields. Some will say you’re premature but they’ll be sorry when you’re cradling a heritage heirloom Cinderella with a deeply ribbed rind and a flattened bosom, perfect for porch styling and baking 🎃
8 Fire up the group Doddle. You’ve gotta get your dates in now if you’re going to see each other this side of Christmas ✔️ 📝
9 Schedule a Zoom meeting about how to use Doddle. There’s always one 👩💻
10 Pick a date that works best for you, knowing full well you’re still not going. No-whey 💃 🐸
11 Watch the Gossip Girl reboot xoxo 📺
12 Have the ‘I deserve to get drunk this weekend’ conversation with yourself. Always a Thursday thought, no? 🥂
13 Dust off the toastie maker for its seasonal debut 🧀
14 Have a night in with The Poet – the ultimate wordsmith (you’re welcome)
15 Realise that the contents of Molly Mae’s wrist is worth more than the contents of your entire life ⌚
16 Carry on blaming your zodiac for all your bad life choices. It’s got you this far ♍
17 Risk-free bleeding on the last day of your period. Another pair of pants lost in the line of duty 🥀
18 Dance in the rain naked, give the neighbours some tantric TEA ☕
19 Keep your eyes peeled for Emily in Paris Season 2 🥖 🇫🇷
20 Realise you can’t really afford October 💀
